While making some Advent art of antiphons and quotes in bright, gilded letters, I found myself pondering the Incarnation of Christ through the eyes of his most Blessed Mother. I set sail in a mediation on what it means to be love in real, true, authentic love. Being in love is not a romantic phenomenon but rather a theological reality. Aren’t we all bound in God’s love? Yes. I would dare say that as Christians, all of us are called to live in love with one another. Moreover, the experience of “being in love” is actually an awareness of love being in us.
As we come closer into alignment with the person God has called us to be, we come to attract more authentic interpersonal relationships. We build chapels, sanctuaries, tabernacles where God’s presence is safe between the space of souls. The sense of new life which one experiences by “falling in love” is not falling at all, but rather an awakening. In the space between souls, we come to recognize that the love which surrounds us, the very presence of God, also dwells within us. We come to an awareness that God is the only reality, that nothing else matters. In doing so, we empty ourselves of pride, we put our selves aside, and surrender to the infinite love that is all in all.
And so, pondering this time through the eyes of Theotokos, this is what I crossed my mind…
Love is a surging current coursing almost unbridled in a
circuit yet unbroken. This electric energy emanates as a beacon of long foretold luminosity. New life is inspiring me to create. When I greet my reflection, the Spirit of the Most high shimmers like glitter in a swirling glass of water. Other describe my countenance as “glowing,” and I say, “it’s the Holy Spirit.”
When I lay down to rest, I can feel God’s embrace at my shoulders, cradling me with an assurance that this is for a noble purpose. I’m veiled in a mantle of reason. When the night grows dim, stars of wisdom sparkle before my eyes. Some mysteries are made clear, and the mysteries that are unclear are embraced as marvelous phenomena.
As new life transforms my being, I ponder the unseen, unheard, unknown with joyful anticipation. The tangible manifestations of an angel’s message challenge my imagination and my relationships with people who will one day come to understand. Consequently, I keep a preponderance of jewel toned marvel nestled in the vault of my heart.
I look to the people I trust to confirm what I am comfortable to disclose. The life within them leaps for joy as well. The accompanying growing pains are incomparable to the suffering which will befall me in labor, and minuscule compared to the inevitable loss which awaits. While the cynical surmise that this is an illusion, the simple of heart greet with exaltation the burdgeoning innocence I carry within me.
I trust that God has put his eyes upon me to be a vessel of his goodness. I spend less time listening to others, and more time listening for God. I spend less time worrying about why or how, when or where and more time in awe of God’s magnificent power. I prepare for responsibilities which will change my life. I prepare to greet new life within me which will change the course of history. Let your will be done, Lord.